Posts Tagged ‘personal growth’

Friday, November 13th, 2009

Twenty Five Tips for Personal Improvement in NYC

We’ve all heard the cliché – life is what you make of it – however, how can you ensure you are making the most out of your life? Most of us, at some point or another, will feel down on ourselves and our achievements. We may feel like we are not fulfilling our life goals and that time is simply passing us by with nothing to show for it. If you are caught in this emotional low, then you need to take a step back and focus on personal improvement.


Personal improvement is the best way to lift your spirits, re-evaluate your life direction and increase your chance of success in everything you do. Personal improvement involves improving your self worth from within- by doing this you are taking the first step to a happier you. The best thing about personal improvement is that it does not take much to improve your self worth. In fact, personal improvement can come simply from getting up a few minutes early, joining a class or enjoying the beautiful New York City views from a new angle. Outlined below are some simple yet effective personal improvement tips that will ensure you are living your life in Manhattan to its full potential each and every day:


Family and Relationships Personal Improvement


  1. Be single and mingle. If you are on the hunt for Mr or Mrs Right, then you need to put yourself out there. Join classes, see sports games, visit galleries and do what you love to do. Eventually you will find someone else who shares these similar passions.
  2. Respect yourself and members of the opposite sex will do the same. I love the phrase: We teach others how we should be treated. What message are you sending on how you should be treated?
  3. Plan trips together, as a couple. For those in a relationship, invest in a yearly vacation for just the two of you. This can be a two week Caribbean adventure or simply a weekend away to the country. Take this time to re-connect as a unit.
  4. Choose family activities you all can enjoy rather than spending the weekends doing separate activities
  5. Always make time for a family meal per day which will allow you to communicate and connect with your loved ones.
  6. Share the responsibilities instead of assuming that someone else will do it. Have both parents cook dinners, do the laundry and be on diaper duty.


Career and Financial Personal Improvement


  1. Assess your skills and thrills and work towards these goals in your career.
  2. Constantly ask questions, which can build communication in the work force and promote a sense of control in your job.
  3. Step away from distractions, including certain co-workers, social networking sites and text messages.
  4. Find your peak work time and take advantage of this. When do you do your best work? For many of us, it is during the morning while others are most productive right before the end of the day. Schedule your harder tasks around these energy boosts.
  5. Track your finances by using a monthly budgeting spreadsheet or compute program. Track what is coming in and what is going out to make sure you stay out of the red.
  6. Be aware of unsecured debt such as your credit card bill. The interest rates on most credit cards are enough to put anyone in dire financial stress. Save the credit card for emergencies or pay it off as best as you can each month.
  7. Research for deals. With the internet, it is easier than ever to do a quick comparison of the different mortgage, car insurance, electricity, phone plans and other rates to make sure you are not paying more than necessary.


Health and Fitness Personal Improvement Tips


  1. Eat breakfast; after all, it’s not called the ‘most important meal of the day’ for nothing.
  2. Take some time to relax each morning. Get up twenty minutes earlier and enjoy a cup of coffee on your balcony. Watch the sun rise over Mid-Town and appreciate the day ahead.
  3. Try to exercise for 30 minutes a day. Even something as small as a 30 minute stroll around your West Village neighbourhood will improve your health
  4. Take up stretching, yoga or Pilates to relax muscles and relieve stress.


Body, Mind and Soul Personal Improvement Tips


  1. If you have the time, volunteer. Giving something back to your NYC community can improve your sense of self worth
  2. Accept mistakes as they happen by developing tolerance and patience. With this comes inner peace.
  3. Keep a journal of your thoughts, fears, worries and problems. Writing your thoughts down can help melt away the stress.
  4. Expect the unexpected. Instead of trying to always control everything around you, understand that there are some things you cannot control. Traffic jams in Manhattan will happen. Just take a deep breath and let nature take its course.
  5. Activate your brain. After they have finished high school and college many people will stop reading and writing on a regular basis. Grab a crossword puzzle or Sudoku to re-activate your mind
  6. Find 20 for you – every day, try to find 20 minutes of ‘me’ time where you can reflect on your day.
  7. Forgive and forget the past. If there is something in the past, such as a poor relationship, holding you back, try to let it go. With time those uncomfortable feelings such as anger, sadness, resentment and rage will fade away as well.
  8. Consider counseling – if there are certain aspects of your life that you simply cannot gain control of, then you might want to speak to someone trained in the area. Many people will turn to a professional NYC psychologist or therapist to help them find the inner strength to reach these personal improvement goals. If you are having trouble finding your self worth and overcoming the obstacles dragging you down, then perhaps a trained counselor can help you find your inner strength to move forward.
Monday, July 20th, 2009

Great quote

I recently came across this great quote by Joseph Conrad:

Facing it, always facing it. That’s the way to get through. Face it.

As a therapist, sometimes my job is to be with my clients as they ‘face it’. Which I take to mean looking at one’s situation in a cold hard light. That can be hard to do – but necessary. Because we all delude ourselves by telling little white lies. These lies can come in the form of:
It’s not that bad.
It’s not my fault.
Things will get better without me changing…I can just wait it out.

Through careful and kind counseling, I work with my clients to strip away the falsehoods and look reality in the face. And when one begins to ‘face it’, it’s good to have someone there to urge us on with encouragement and support – knowing that we are not alone. This is the gift of therapy.

Only by being honest and true, can we take a full assessment of our lives and then begin to make real and concrete changes. If we don’t, we end up just ‘doing what we’ve always done and getting what we’ve always gotten’.

Life’s too short. Change and personal growth can be difficult. But the alternative is stagnation. And a stagnant life can be full of depression, anxiety, fear, anger, etc.

Are you ready to face it?

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